Friend Families lets two households connect to chat, share photos, and see each other's forum posts. We shipped it recently, and while testing it properly this week, we didn't love a couple of things about how it worked — so we changed them before it saw wide use.
1. We removed the searchable family list
The original version had a "Find Families" tab: a search box where you could type a few letters and browse every household on OurFamilyGrid by name, see how many members they had, and send a connection request with one click. It only ever showed a household name and a member count — no emails, no individual names, no location — but on reflection, that's still more than we're comfortable putting in front of a stranger.
The whole point of a family platform is that it isn't a public directory. So we got rid of it. There is no way to browse or search for a household on OurFamilyGrid any more.
2. Connecting now requires a Family ID and a Passcode
In its place, every household now has:
- A Family ID — a fixed code like
AB3D-7K2Q, shown only to that household on their own Friend Families page. - A Passcode — a 6-digit code shown alongside it, which can be regenerated at any time if it's ever shared with the wrong person.
To send a connection request, you now need both pieces, from a family you actually know — over text, in person, however you'd share a phone number. Having just one (say, a leaked ID) gets you nowhere. And even with both, the other household still has to accept before anything is shared.
3. Messaging between connected households is now adults-only
Once two households connect, members can message each other directly. We hadn't put any age check on that at all — which meant, in theory, any member of a connected household (including a child's account) could message, or be messaged by, any member of the other household.
That's now blocked at the account level, not just hidden in the interface: if either person's date of birth on file puts them under 18, that conversation simply isn't available — not to start, not to read, not to send. Accounts that haven't set a date of birth aren't blocked by this (most existing accounts never filled it in), but any account we can positively confirm belongs to a minor is excluded from cross-household messaging entirely.
Why bother writing this up
Because "trust us" isn't worth much without specifics. We'd rather tell you exactly what changed, including the bit where we admit the first version wasn't good enough, than just quietly patch it and say nothing. If you spot something else that doesn't sit right, tell us — that's genuinely how these get found.